“Rants” is my willingness to be sloppy. It’s the prose before the refinement happens. It’s mostly about my experiences in the sex industry, where desire begins and ends and where I curl myself around it and play. These stories contain places I hide myself, travel to, dance and scream. Dig in.
Antonia Crane
"Just like hopes springing high, Still I'll rise" Maya Angelou
Hey Antonia! I met you at The Good Luck bar – for like, 2 seconds – when David Ulin was signing our books. I got my MFA in poetry from Antioch in ’04. Anyway, you mentioned Rumpus and that was the first I’d heard about it. Then I’m at Joe’s pizza (of NY, like myself) and the (very tattooed) guy behind the counter, Greg, mentioned it to me. He knew who you were and I thought, “ok that’s twice in one week. Maybe I’d better check this out!” So, I did. I like your writing and wanted to let you know. Great meeting you. Perhaps our paths will cross again…
Suzan
Hey Suzan, so nice to meet you. That was a terrific lineup. David Ulin came to Antioch before I went there. Do you like his new book? Can I add your link to my favorites?
I love your work. Will you exchange links with me?
Love Widow
Thank you. Absolutely. Consider it done.
Hi Antonia,
Wondering about your memoir that we discussed briefly at Rob/David reading? Let me know if I can be of help. Best, Roy
PS: Stay in touch with Vanessa, she has incredible instincts as an editor and writer.
Hi Antonia,
I produce a zine called SanFranSexy which highlights sex positive culture in San Francisco, and would love to feature some of your work. My line up of contributors includes Carol Queen, Charlie Glickman and various other fabulous folks. Let me know if you’re interested and I can send you the details.
I love your writing!
I love the words here. I run a small press out of Detroit called Black Coffee Press. If you got a manuscript send it my way. We publish cool shit with an edge.
Hi Black Coffee Press, Will send you email now.
Just wanted to say “sup” and let you know that today I was reflecting on the times of KHPB and old friends we had, including the lovely Ms. Grant…….its crazy to really look back and first think about all the people we touched, the people that touched us, the experiences, and those connections that stay with you. it is both sad and happy to reflect and remember and give into the fog of nostalgia for just a few minutes to think how things may have been and have been. i am always grateful for meeting (some) of the people there; and really happy to NOT be a part of most people there, and throw the rest into my bag of things that “make me, me”. i appreciate you, your memories, your friendship, your love, your stories, your writings, your aura and most of all appreciate you. loosing people during out lives is always startling, sad, sorrowful, souly soulful and also wholly happy both because i can take solace in my belief that they have entered the next phase in their journey and because they will always be with us in mind. fuck the rest, because when there is love involved, then anytime somebody has the gall to leave also just creates that sadness too. my grandmother passed away a year and a half ago, my best friend from high school was killed fifteen years ago next month, and many others in life continue to come and go – - – but with head held high I can honestly appreciate the dying of the light and the birth of a new shiny person, place or thing. i hope that you have a really good day, week and on and on. Keep taking care of yourself, watch yourself, be careful with yourself, and remember your friend Dude who is still chillen in Portland and once and awhile checking up on you. keep writing, and once i get my act together (and this horrible case of writers block i have been trying to break from for over 3 years now) i will be sending you some stuff too. much love, mando.
haha…sorry, i thought this was your private email – - you may want to take my post off! :-/ hope you are well.
you taught me how to play “liars Dice” cant rememberhow old we were. lasy five years i can tell you all about, but the 20yrs before that are kind of blur. we were in the same towns at the same times so im sure we met numerous times at, gigs,clubs, or parties in SF, L.A., NY, or Atlanta and had no idea who each of us were. Just wanted to say hello and i truly love your style of writing, an oldfriend of mine, Michael Dean, from SF is a writer as well, and you are the only person i have read that gave me that same feeling. the feeling as if im there in the moment you are writing of, so thank you for allowing your talent to rise to surface through all your trials. My life is amazing now, but i lost my love for my talents, or I actually I am Scared of my talents…but thats my own weird insecurities.Ive been foollowing your writings for a while but have never made contact until now, when I read how you learned how to play “Liars Dice” It forced the memory of all of us at probably 14yrs getting drunk at your house on Buhne Hill. a girl named Sheri(i think)my buddy Morgan Davis, me (Tim Flemming) and a cuple other freinds. We smoked cigars, got drunk, and you taught me “Liars Dice” keep up the incredible work Antonia you are Amazingly talented. My Sister makes films in L.A. im back in Humboldt since 1998 but im in LA all the time,so maybe we will run into each other one day. Have a great Life! p.s. this is tim flemming, dont feel bad if you dont remember me…last time i saw you, we were drunk and 14 in Eureka ca hahahaha…
Hey,
Been following your blog for a while now & think it’s great. I used to strip in SF & am working on a documentary about the strip clubs & labor conditions (www.licensetopimp.com).
I’m going to NOLA next wk (to show a short doc film @ the New Orleans Film Fest). I’d love to meet up with some strippers while I’m there. Any suggestions? Also would love to meet any sex workers who are impacted by the Sex Offender registration via the Soliticitation of Crimes Against Nature (SCAN).
It’s been a great half hour trawling through your blog – I write my own on being a stripper in the UK, so I love reading other peoples experiences. You fancy doing a guest post? check out my blog and email me at http://sassylapdancer.blogspot.com/ I would love to get some insights form a dancer who worked in a different country and culture to me
Keep up the scribbling xxx
I’m not interested in naming heroes or villans, prey or stalked, or in even trying to define either, but I am intersted in the chaos of the human condition and the complex set of possibilites and reactions that each of us face in our daily lives, and of course, what this has to do with the world in general. I was once with a beautiful woman who was a sex worker. She was married, I was married. Our partners were married. The world wasn’t watching or waiting for either of us to comment or judge. It could have been anything. True. False. Fake emotion. Honest response. I don’t think anyone checked. All I know is that there was pleasure. If there was any hypocracity, then it probably wasn’t much different than pretending to have fun at a business dinner when you didn’t neccearily want to be there. I didn’t think that the money that I paid to her entitled me to more than that, but if was able to accept more on an emotional level, it was there for her as much as her willingness to share her body with me was. But when the door closed, we went back home.
Hey Antonia- I am excited about reading more of your work; I just discovered your writing through my big-time appreciation for Michelle Tea. So…I saw references to my hometown in your “intrests” shout-out thingie. Lafayette, La., that is. This makes me appreciate your work even more! This is a great place. Allons a Lafayette real soon, boo!
Peace,
Jane
hi antonia,
i like your work. let’s meet for chat (and coffee, or ice-cream, or a venice board’walk’…)
i’m a fellow author, most relevantly, of “ivy league stripper’, and i’m also a fellow former stripper.
i live in la, the venice/marina area.
look forward to meeting you,
heidi
I imagine you’d be interested in the site I posted below as well. It’s an effort to provide tools of organization to strengthen the community of dancers.
Contributions from a ‘retired’ dancer are most welcome as well!
Hey Antonia!
First of all, your blog is very moving. I appreciate the depth of writing…
I wanted to reach out to you because I think you might be interested in a new online community for exotic dancers/strippers http://www.dancethepoles.com. The site has recently launched and the focus now is to build the user base through mentions in magazines, blogs, websites, etc.
Have a look at the site and let me know what you think.
Please contact me for any reason!
In stripping solidarity,
–
Ben
Project Director,
Dance The Poles, LLC.
Dear Antonia,
I am a German documentary filmmaker and would like to talk to you about my current project, a 45-minute documentary about the sex industry. Could you please get in touch with me or let me know how I can reach you?
Thanks
Sonia
Have you ever read this book?
http://www.amazon.com/Whack-Side-Head-More-Creative/dp/0446404667/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1357490304&sr=8-1&keywords=a+whack+on+the+side+of+the+head
Antonia, I’ve been following your blog for about 2 years and I think your writing is amazing. You can really draw a person into your life. sometimes I can even smell the overly bleached smell of some of the clubs you describe.
Have you ever considered self publishing your work. It is not very hard to flow your writing into “iBooks Author” and set up an account with Apple to sell your book thru the iTunes store… i’ve considered doing it for some of my own work and I bet you could pull it off. AT that point it is just a matter of self promoting.
Although your book may make LESS money total, I bet you’d take home a better percentage of it, and therefore make more money.
It may be worth looking into
Hello, Antonia.
My name is Meredith Landry, and I’m the managing editor of Role/Reboot, an online magazine that looks at contemporary gender roles, families, sex and relationships. I’d love to publish your work from time to time on our site, if you’re up for that. In the meantime, I just came across this on Salon (http://www.salon.com/2013/01/06/my_lucky_thunder_thighs/) that I’d love to republish. Could I get your permission to do that? Of course, we’ll give full credit and link back to the original, whatever you need. Just let me know.
Look forward to sharing your work!
Meredith.
Hi Meredith, Of course! Yes. All of that would be completely awesome. Thank you so much. Here is my actual email: antoniacrane@gmail.com. Thank you so much!
Hi, I was just crusing around on the net looking up Pank stuff and I stumbled across your story “Touch Me Like you Know Me.” That is the best little piece of fiction I’ve read in a long time. Tragic, beautiful, funny…man, that was just a great little story. I’m glad there was a place to post my appreciation for it. I’ll be looking for more of your work.
Take care and best of luck,
Jeff
Hi Antonia -
I’m a friend of Conrad Romo. I was at his last T&G but didn’t have a chance to introduce myself. I’m a fan of your no holds barred writing and interviews for The Rumpus and wondered if you might be interested in a review copy of The Hobbyist by Darryl Shelly (Bexley Press/March 2013). The book is based on his Shelly’s life experiences, which are like a page out of Goodfellas. Born in Chicago, his father was a member of the Chicago Syndicate, started by Al Capone, so he grew up with car bombs exploding in front his house, frequent telephone death threats, police busting in with search warrants, and he and his family were briefly in protective custody under Federal Protection.
After escaping to New York City to attend art school, Darryl wound up in the wrong circle of friends, and his hunger for safety, intimacy, and pleasure lured him into New York’s underworld of illicit sex, and down the road of sexual addiction. In his 20s, Shelly counted over 1,500 women ––more than Hugh Hefner’s outrageous 1000, and more than most men will have in a lifetime. He eventually found his way to LA where he met his wife, Tami, who helped him overcome his destructive behavior through love, acceptance, and unrelenting support. He also took up various creative endeavors to replace the “black hole” of his addictive compulsions with positive and meaningful activities, like writing and photography.
After much prodding from friends, Darryl chronicled his experiences of sexual addiction in his recent literary fiction debut, The Hobbyist. The book has received great reviews in Kirkus and The San Francisco Book Review, and more importantly I believe that Darryl’s story offers a unique portrait of sexual addiction from a man’s perspective. Darryl is open to speaking about his experiences, so he’d be available for an interview if you’re interested. For more information about Darryl Shelly, visit: http://www.darrylshelly.com.
Thanks for considering.
Best,
Julia